by Lynn Cowell

Did you go through that awkward phase where you weren’t quite sure where you fit? Me too! On the cross country team, but not on the varsity. A member of my school’s music groups, but not the honor choir. Where did I belong?

This belonging I craved couldn’t be attained no matter what I did or how hard I tried. I felt my lack of talents put me at a disadvantage.

If I could spend some time with my young self, I’d share this truth that’s taken me too long to come to: You already have an advantage because you are loved! There is no greater advantage we can have than to know we are deeply, unconditionally and wildly loved by God.

The girl, who truly knows this can experience benefits that status, success or social standing can never give.

A girl who knows she’s loved can become:

1. A Risk Taker

Our culture is risk-averse. Where does this fear come from? We don’t tell toddlers not to try walking until they won’t fall! Yet girls receive this message: don’t try unless you’re sure you won’t fail.

Yet Isaiah 41:10 tells us: Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand (ESV). Whether she succeeds or fails, she doesn’t fall because she is learning! Whether she gets it right or messes up, God is with her, for her and crazy about her. Nothing she does or could ever do changes that! With that level of security, she can take good risks.

2. A Drama Defeater

Mark 12:31 says: “The second is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these” (ESV). At first glance, this commandment seems almost selfish. So I have to love me first?

Yes, because to the depth you understand how wildly God loves you, to that degree will you love others.

A girl with this secure foundation of love can discern what is really happening when drama stirs. The offender may feel insecure, unloved, that they don’t belong, or threatened. Defensiveness isn’t just a young girl thing! It’s a big girl thing too!

What would happen in the Church if you and I taught and modeled knowing we are loved and then loving others out of this fullness? We would all become drama defeaters and love bringers.

3. A Faithful Friend

1 John 4:7 tells us, Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God (ESV).

The foundation for being a faithful friend is knowing God and His love for us. His investment of love gives us the currency to love others.

When a girl knows Jesus’ love and how faithful of a friend He is to her, she can, in turn, be that faithful friend to another. We love because he first loved us (1 John 4:19, ESV).

4. A Confident Creation

I think confidence might be one of the most misunderstood traits for Christian women. Isn’t it the same as pride or arrogance? Not when it is built on God.

Christ confidence comes from a full trust and a firm belief in God’s power, trustworthiness, and reliability. We can be confident not based on our performance, but on love. The one who knows she is loved, holds on to her Christ confidence because it didn’t come from her performance so her performance can’t take it away!

5. Protected by His Presence

There is a layer of protection a girl has when she knows she is loved by God. It is not a protection that means she will not experience any trouble. Jesus told us just the opposite in John 16:33 when He said we would experience trouble. But He also said He has overcome the world and He lives in those who are His own. His presence, in her and around her, brings a sense of peace and security even in the midst of trouble.

May you and I saturate in this truth: we are deeply loved by our Father. And as we do, may we become conduits to spill this love and change the lives of the girls who surround us.


Am I loved? Am I valuable? Am I smart? The questions can go on for as long as a girl’s imagination and self-image allow. A girl needs to know that she is enough because of God’s love. Loved and Cherished: 100 Devotions for Girls helps girls ages 8-12 to discover the perfect, unconditional love in God.

Buy one copy of Loved & Cherished and Lynn & Michelle will give a copy to a girl in foster care! Order today at lovedandcherished.me!


Lynn Cowell is part of the Proverbs 31 Ministries speaker and writing teams. As the author of several books, her newest book is: Loved & Cherished: 100 Devotionals for Girls, written especially for girls ages 8 – 12 years old, empowering them to live daily out of God’s deep love. Lynn calls home North Carolina, where she and her husband, Greg and the occasional backyard deer are adjusting to life as “just us”.

© 2020 by Lynn Cowell. All rights reserved.